He has passion
He has awakened
It's so great to hear
It's all I ever waited
To see him alive and not dead
I couldn't be happier for him!!!!
I wish he was always like that...alive.
Now I realize why I fell for him. He felt alive and he made me feel alive. The fire inside. The ignition of my insides. And now, the ignition of his. If I play my cards right (and the stars are in my favor because at this point it will take some cosmic assistance) I could have him...
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
Friday, January 13, 2012
I just saw my ex
Or at least some motherfucker that looks just like him. He was much beefier but the eyes, the nose, the complexion, the beauty marks, the lips, the glasses. I mean, I swear to God it was him but I couldn't even say anything. I just kept getting off the train. I thought, if it were him, he would recognize me and say something. Wtf?
Why the fuck do I think he would greet me in any manner? What the hell would I have to say? What the hell do we have to talk about? It bothered me that if it was him that he wouldn't recognize me nor say hello (he did always say he wouldn't piss on me I was on the street).
As I got off the train I reasoned with myself that it wasn't him. Then just as I looked up, I saw the name Peter Frampton on the Chicago Theatre sign. Right after that, By The Time I Get To Phoenix comes on the iPhone. At that point I knew it didn't matter whether it was him or not. What matters is that the universe is begging me at this point to deal with the baggage from my ex. I can't ignore the signs any longer.
Boss Lady talked a lot about the signs while we were in MCO. This whole thing with Carl was the first hint. It was the first alert that I better deal with my shit or else. The Peter Frampton sign has to do with the fact that my ex use to listen to this one Peter Frampton song over and over again. It was "do you feel like I do" and I can't stand to hear it now because he played it out.
I never listened to any Isaac Hayes music before my ex. Of the few songs he shared with me, By The Time I Get To Phoenix was the one I didn't listen to much at all. The song is mostly just talking and I have to admit I have never really listened to the words until today. It's about a man who keeps loving a woman and she keeps breaking his heart. He does everything for her and she just cheats on him. She doesn't seem to give him love, she just takes it.
I haven't begun to deal with my old relationship. I never thought I had to. I knew I had some baggage but it's a lot more than I ever imagined. After the Isaac Hayes song went off, Sade's By Your Side came on. That song use to describe how I felt about my ex. Except I did the exact opposite of what that song says. So much guilt.
Let the soul work began :-(
Why the fuck do I think he would greet me in any manner? What the hell would I have to say? What the hell do we have to talk about? It bothered me that if it was him that he wouldn't recognize me nor say hello (he did always say he wouldn't piss on me I was on the street).
As I got off the train I reasoned with myself that it wasn't him. Then just as I looked up, I saw the name Peter Frampton on the Chicago Theatre sign. Right after that, By The Time I Get To Phoenix comes on the iPhone. At that point I knew it didn't matter whether it was him or not. What matters is that the universe is begging me at this point to deal with the baggage from my ex. I can't ignore the signs any longer.
Boss Lady talked a lot about the signs while we were in MCO. This whole thing with Carl was the first hint. It was the first alert that I better deal with my shit or else. The Peter Frampton sign has to do with the fact that my ex use to listen to this one Peter Frampton song over and over again. It was "do you feel like I do" and I can't stand to hear it now because he played it out.
I never listened to any Isaac Hayes music before my ex. Of the few songs he shared with me, By The Time I Get To Phoenix was the one I didn't listen to much at all. The song is mostly just talking and I have to admit I have never really listened to the words until today. It's about a man who keeps loving a woman and she keeps breaking his heart. He does everything for her and she just cheats on him. She doesn't seem to give him love, she just takes it.
I haven't begun to deal with my old relationship. I never thought I had to. I knew I had some baggage but it's a lot more than I ever imagined. After the Isaac Hayes song went off, Sade's By Your Side came on. That song use to describe how I felt about my ex. Except I did the exact opposite of what that song says. So much guilt.
Let the soul work began :-(
Monday, January 9, 2012
And the plot thickens
I am at Epcot in Orlando and although I should be enjoying my time here, I have sabotaged aspects of my life that have robbed the joy of my marathon weekend. Though this hurt is supposed to be a good thing, I'm an over it.
Saturday, January 7, 2012
Your Race Your Pace
Today I was able to complete my first half marathon! It was soooo amazing and liberating. I felt like I could run 26 miles!!!
What a weekend I just had. I can not begin to tell you how incredibly blessed I am. Back in June of last year during the art fair weekend, the Boss Lady asked me if I wanted to run a half marathon with her. I have known this woman since I was 15. I said, sure. I didn't realize what I was signing up for and I also didn't take her invitation seriously. The half would be in WDW and well, it's pretty well known I have an affection for Minnie.
Not too long after the art fair Boss Lady contacted me on Facebook asking me if I would really do this with her. She sent me all the info I needed to run as well as a training program by Jeff Galloway. I started training that month and registered for the half shortly afterwards.
I have always admired runners but decided that cardio wasn't my thing (it still isn't). I chalked running up as cardio. I sometimes get seasonal allergies and tend to overheat when it's too hot outside. Suffice to say, I did not run outside. I despised it. I preferred the treadmill hands down. What could be nicer than running in an air conditioned room, watching a tv or listening to your iPod, while running at a controlled pace? That was the life for me. I would get to my hotels and be so proud of myself for doing two miles in 35 minutes.
Since I wasn't an outdoor runner, I thought that training outside would be more helpful for running the half. I remember my first. I left the house with just my keys, some bus fare, ID, and my debit card. All of which I stowed in my sports bra. I think I might have brought my phone too. I definitely wasn't in the best shape at the time and my injury didn't help either but I started running. I liked it and it was shocking to me. Pretty soon I was leaving the house with only my keys. The girl who couldn't run without a distraction now hated the idea of being weighed down by too much shit (boy, is that symbolic now. That will be coming to a blog near you).
I ran every other day according to the training program and recorded all my runs. The husband was/is sooo supportive of my endeavors. He reminded me to run and encouraged me on my lazy days. He set me up with cool running gear and bought me an amazing garmin watch for our anniversary. I got better and better at running and my body even started to change. I feel like I am in the best shape of my life and that became noticeable. People started commenting on how much better I looked (damn, was I that bad???).
I came out of the gate too strong during the early training days and it caused a 3 week break in training. My legs heavy, my form was wrong, and my breathing was not what it should be. I also had a really bad couple weeks of the turbulence injury pain that debilitated me. I was mega dizzy and didn't feel like I could work. Well, the dizziness solution was solved by wearing my reading glasses. Who knew? I also started physical therapy again I help with the neck pain. Lucky for me, in hardly ever feel my injury when I run.
I just had a bit of de ja vu!!!!! Whoo Hooo!!!!!!! I am on a DL flight from MCO to MSP. Ok, back to the blog.
Chocolate Ice Cream aka CIC has a huge part in my running story. He helped me along the way with training tips and he loaned me the book that changed my view of who am I: Born to Run. It was reading that book that gave me confidence, taught me about smart running, made me a bit of a barefoot enthusiast, and let me know I was born to do this. This book corrected my running form by retraining how I run. I have a great midfoot strike right now with good posture. I know to breathe now. I ran most of my half breathing through my nose (winter running ftw)! I got proper rest and really started listening to my body.
All of my training lead up to the moment at Disney where on January 7, 2012 I woke my black ass up at 0345 to run 13.1 miles. It was hands down the most liberating experience of my life. Running is all the freedom I have ever wanted. I didn't know I was a runner. It has changed my life in so many ways.
This was the first race I have ever done. I set my first PR (personal record...which reminds me. I plan to write a running vocab entry). I made a mistake by waiting in a long line to use the restroom. That slapped an extra 14 minutes on my official Disney run time. My garmin clocked me in at 2:32:18. My goal was 2:36. I came in about 4 minutes under!!!! Thrilling.
Running with other runners was an interesting experience. I was in the wrong corral and I had to do a lot of maneuvering. I should have been in a higher corral. I started in the 3 hour group and probably ended up in the 3:15-3:30 groups after waiting for the bathroom for so long. Learned so much about runners etiquette from situation such as when and how to pass other runners, dropping things, water station use and cup/water disposal, etc.
I was advised by Jeff Galloway himself (met him twice that weekend) to start off easy. Don't start too quickly because it will bite you in the ass. This was already my plan but hearing it from the man himself really confirmed the idea. I decided I was run between a 12-13min/mi for the first 3-4 miles and that's what I did. I decided that miles 5-10 should be between 11-12min/mi and I was able to accomplish that as well. When I got to mile 10.1 I decided I wanted to do the remaining distance at 10min/mile or 6mph. It wasn't until mile 11 that I really decided to take off. I got so pumped toward the end. I always tell myself to finish strong but even I was amazed at my burst out.
I wanted to run the entire time and I did. That and pooping before the run were my top priorities. I told myself to have fun. To take in the energy of the day. To be sure to smile. It was such a scenic route. I got to run through Magic Kingdom and a bit of Epcot. There were tons of spectators and cheerers. There were characters along the route. Since I prefer to run naked (meaning no shit to drag around, not even water which will probably change when I buy one of those fancy running belts for longer runs) and didn't plan on stopping, I didn't get to truly enjoy what this run had to offer. I am so happy this was my first run because from what I hear, there ain't as much to see on other runs. When I run this next year, I will make time to stop to get pictures with the many characters along the route. I will run from character to character.
Boss Lady told me she would be at mile 8 cheering. First let me say the original plan was to run the race with her. The entire time I was worried about being too fast for her. In the end I decided it was more important to run with her since she sponsored this entire trip. She didn't break the news to me that she wasn't running until I got here. I was sad about it. Mostly sad for her because I know it meant a lot to her to run. She injured her foot badly a whole back and hasn't completely recovered. She walked the 5K though which was such a strong thing to do. I was so proud of her.
As I was getting around to mile 8 I was overjoyed to see her. I am so grateful for her presence in my life. I am not sure she knows how she changed me forever. She too believes that the universe works for you, not against you. She believes that it puts you in the right place at the right time. How much of a blessing is it for our souls to have written such a beautiful story. She inspires me.
She bought this race retreat package that guaranteed a warm meal after the race in a special tent with comfy couches, buzz, woody, carpet and free socks. You can't go wrong with that! This was hers but she gave it to me since she wasn't running. It was well used and appreciated. I had two plates of food... Hey, I burned 1600 calories in 2.5 hours. It was time to replenish!
The marathon week at WDW consists of several races and an expo. Everyone has to attend the expo to pick up their race packet. There are all sorts of things to do and see there. As for the races, there was a kids one mile thing I think, there was a 5k, a half, a relay, and a full. The races are stretched over a few days. If you did the half ad the full that was known as a Goofy. Donald was the half. Mickey was the full. Chip and Dale was the relay which I think is split in a 5mi and then 8mi thing or two halves. The three caballeros was the 5K. If you did the 5K, the half, and the full, that was considered the unofficial Dopey. The relay goes under the Dopey as well. The Chip and Dale, Goofy, and Mickey are all on the same course on the same date and time. The Dopey is my goal for next year. I am amped about that. I will go for coast to coast medals this year by running in The WDL half or full. Or maybe even both.
This was such an amazing weekend. My life is forever changed. I was amongst my people and boy did it feel amazing.
What a weekend I just had. I can not begin to tell you how incredibly blessed I am. Back in June of last year during the art fair weekend, the Boss Lady asked me if I wanted to run a half marathon with her. I have known this woman since I was 15. I said, sure. I didn't realize what I was signing up for and I also didn't take her invitation seriously. The half would be in WDW and well, it's pretty well known I have an affection for Minnie.
Not too long after the art fair Boss Lady contacted me on Facebook asking me if I would really do this with her. She sent me all the info I needed to run as well as a training program by Jeff Galloway. I started training that month and registered for the half shortly afterwards.
I have always admired runners but decided that cardio wasn't my thing (it still isn't). I chalked running up as cardio. I sometimes get seasonal allergies and tend to overheat when it's too hot outside. Suffice to say, I did not run outside. I despised it. I preferred the treadmill hands down. What could be nicer than running in an air conditioned room, watching a tv or listening to your iPod, while running at a controlled pace? That was the life for me. I would get to my hotels and be so proud of myself for doing two miles in 35 minutes.
Since I wasn't an outdoor runner, I thought that training outside would be more helpful for running the half. I remember my first. I left the house with just my keys, some bus fare, ID, and my debit card. All of which I stowed in my sports bra. I think I might have brought my phone too. I definitely wasn't in the best shape at the time and my injury didn't help either but I started running. I liked it and it was shocking to me. Pretty soon I was leaving the house with only my keys. The girl who couldn't run without a distraction now hated the idea of being weighed down by too much shit (boy, is that symbolic now. That will be coming to a blog near you).
I ran every other day according to the training program and recorded all my runs. The husband was/is sooo supportive of my endeavors. He reminded me to run and encouraged me on my lazy days. He set me up with cool running gear and bought me an amazing garmin watch for our anniversary. I got better and better at running and my body even started to change. I feel like I am in the best shape of my life and that became noticeable. People started commenting on how much better I looked (damn, was I that bad???).
I came out of the gate too strong during the early training days and it caused a 3 week break in training. My legs heavy, my form was wrong, and my breathing was not what it should be. I also had a really bad couple weeks of the turbulence injury pain that debilitated me. I was mega dizzy and didn't feel like I could work. Well, the dizziness solution was solved by wearing my reading glasses. Who knew? I also started physical therapy again I help with the neck pain. Lucky for me, in hardly ever feel my injury when I run.
I just had a bit of de ja vu!!!!! Whoo Hooo!!!!!!! I am on a DL flight from MCO to MSP. Ok, back to the blog.
Chocolate Ice Cream aka CIC has a huge part in my running story. He helped me along the way with training tips and he loaned me the book that changed my view of who am I: Born to Run. It was reading that book that gave me confidence, taught me about smart running, made me a bit of a barefoot enthusiast, and let me know I was born to do this. This book corrected my running form by retraining how I run. I have a great midfoot strike right now with good posture. I know to breathe now. I ran most of my half breathing through my nose (winter running ftw)! I got proper rest and really started listening to my body.
All of my training lead up to the moment at Disney where on January 7, 2012 I woke my black ass up at 0345 to run 13.1 miles. It was hands down the most liberating experience of my life. Running is all the freedom I have ever wanted. I didn't know I was a runner. It has changed my life in so many ways.
This was the first race I have ever done. I set my first PR (personal record...which reminds me. I plan to write a running vocab entry). I made a mistake by waiting in a long line to use the restroom. That slapped an extra 14 minutes on my official Disney run time. My garmin clocked me in at 2:32:18. My goal was 2:36. I came in about 4 minutes under!!!! Thrilling.
Running with other runners was an interesting experience. I was in the wrong corral and I had to do a lot of maneuvering. I should have been in a higher corral. I started in the 3 hour group and probably ended up in the 3:15-3:30 groups after waiting for the bathroom for so long. Learned so much about runners etiquette from situation such as when and how to pass other runners, dropping things, water station use and cup/water disposal, etc.
I was advised by Jeff Galloway himself (met him twice that weekend) to start off easy. Don't start too quickly because it will bite you in the ass. This was already my plan but hearing it from the man himself really confirmed the idea. I decided I was run between a 12-13min/mi for the first 3-4 miles and that's what I did. I decided that miles 5-10 should be between 11-12min/mi and I was able to accomplish that as well. When I got to mile 10.1 I decided I wanted to do the remaining distance at 10min/mile or 6mph. It wasn't until mile 11 that I really decided to take off. I got so pumped toward the end. I always tell myself to finish strong but even I was amazed at my burst out.
I wanted to run the entire time and I did. That and pooping before the run were my top priorities. I told myself to have fun. To take in the energy of the day. To be sure to smile. It was such a scenic route. I got to run through Magic Kingdom and a bit of Epcot. There were tons of spectators and cheerers. There were characters along the route. Since I prefer to run naked (meaning no shit to drag around, not even water which will probably change when I buy one of those fancy running belts for longer runs) and didn't plan on stopping, I didn't get to truly enjoy what this run had to offer. I am so happy this was my first run because from what I hear, there ain't as much to see on other runs. When I run this next year, I will make time to stop to get pictures with the many characters along the route. I will run from character to character.
Boss Lady told me she would be at mile 8 cheering. First let me say the original plan was to run the race with her. The entire time I was worried about being too fast for her. In the end I decided it was more important to run with her since she sponsored this entire trip. She didn't break the news to me that she wasn't running until I got here. I was sad about it. Mostly sad for her because I know it meant a lot to her to run. She injured her foot badly a whole back and hasn't completely recovered. She walked the 5K though which was such a strong thing to do. I was so proud of her.
As I was getting around to mile 8 I was overjoyed to see her. I am so grateful for her presence in my life. I am not sure she knows how she changed me forever. She too believes that the universe works for you, not against you. She believes that it puts you in the right place at the right time. How much of a blessing is it for our souls to have written such a beautiful story. She inspires me.
She bought this race retreat package that guaranteed a warm meal after the race in a special tent with comfy couches, buzz, woody, carpet and free socks. You can't go wrong with that! This was hers but she gave it to me since she wasn't running. It was well used and appreciated. I had two plates of food... Hey, I burned 1600 calories in 2.5 hours. It was time to replenish!
The marathon week at WDW consists of several races and an expo. Everyone has to attend the expo to pick up their race packet. There are all sorts of things to do and see there. As for the races, there was a kids one mile thing I think, there was a 5k, a half, a relay, and a full. The races are stretched over a few days. If you did the half ad the full that was known as a Goofy. Donald was the half. Mickey was the full. Chip and Dale was the relay which I think is split in a 5mi and then 8mi thing or two halves. The three caballeros was the 5K. If you did the 5K, the half, and the full, that was considered the unofficial Dopey. The relay goes under the Dopey as well. The Chip and Dale, Goofy, and Mickey are all on the same course on the same date and time. The Dopey is my goal for next year. I am amped about that. I will go for coast to coast medals this year by running in The WDL half or full. Or maybe even both.
This was such an amazing weekend. My life is forever changed. I was amongst my people and boy did it feel amazing.
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