So it's been an interesting two days. Yesterday I had a mandatory meeting with Inflight because another FA complained about my behavior during a flight. I'm not really sure what Compass will do about it. I'm in limbo with them right now. Additionally I am dealing with some type of stomach virus. I've pooped everything out and threw everything up to the point where I can't even hold down water. I haven't eaten anything today and I am currently working a flight from DFW to LAX. I just told the pilots to send and ACARS that I will not be able to work my next flight to SFO.
I really wanted to because I feel like it will be good to get away from CIC for a bit right now. He has been nursing me ever since I tried to kill myself and I'm over it. Maybe I'll feel better when we land but right now I am sucking on ice and it's making my stomach hurt again. That means no food or water. Wonder if I can do it? And if I am sick, does working mean I am choosing my job over my well being?
In fact, I dare say this is what this sickness is all about. I just so happen to get sick a few hours after eating airplane food. The food literally made me sick to my stomach. Ingesting airline makes me sick to my stomach. I think it's time to bid this job adieu and I'm really confused about what I should be doing. I couldn't find my old school weight and balance forms and I told myself that when this forms run out then I'll walk away from CP. I'm sure there in my bag somewhere.
If I could be doing anything in the world right now I would be teaching yoga classes a few times a day and traveling on CIC's benefits. I am not sure flying is for me anymore. I don't feel any joy with it. I don't want to be fired from CP but if it happened I am not sure it would be the worse thing in the world. I want to leave on my terms though. This job is making me sick.
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